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“Yes,” he finished, “I think you’re gay.”“You’re also a scientist and follow scientific methods. What evidence do you have that I’m gay? Have you seen me kissing another boy or indulging in gay sex?”“Well, not exactly.”“So why do you think I’m gay?”“I don’t know. It’s just that everything about you screams ‘gay’.”“Like the quality of my interior decorating? You’ve seen my room, haven’t you! And how about my hairdressing skills?” I ran my hand through my unruly mop of hair to emphasis just how inept I was. “And you’ve seen my acting skills. To be or not to be...” I hammed, waving my arms theatrically.Michael sniggered. “I don’t know man, I just know that you’re gay.”“Just supposing I wasn’t gay, and someone had somehow convinced the people around me to believe that I was, how could they have done it? Do you think you could research a list of methods for me?”“What’s the point? You’re gay. Everyone knows it.”I sighed inwardly. This was proving tougher than I had hoped. I decided to try. "He wasn't happy, but did put me in touch with the company Jack used to work with, to get me private security. They agreed to fly in immediately and find ways to limit the obstruction to my life, as much as possible. It was money well spent, and apparently to be paid by the Judge's Federal budget.That night I reset all my safety switches, buttoned down the farm, and deliberately went to sleep without allowing myself to obsess about more shooters coming to finish me off.The next week flew by. The new security guys were extremely professional, and very skilled at being nearby without being in my face. We got along great, especially when I hired pilots from their company, and sent the Dealer back his crew.Over the next couple weeks the farm was transformed into a model of safety, and security, without turning it into a compound. My guards put in lots of special touches that would strongly discourage any more attacks, and inflict great harm to anyone who didn't belong.As the weather.
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